insomnia

i've been having insomnia for a few days in a row when i tried to sleep at around 1+ but i'm still awake rolling on the bed at 3.30am.

Some studies said to clear your head of thoughts 10-20 minutes before you go to bed so that you will have a good sleep. i think i think too much when i'm in bed. even when i'm sleeping i keep having this feeling i'm not really asleep coz i am dreaming all the way till morning. and i study right before bed.

I really need to study and catch up to hang on to my gpa or improve. Exam's coming in a months time, i'm still unclear about stuff.

I dunno about others but when i study, especially engine cores where knowledge comes in the form of formulas, numbers, equations, technical explanations, science, phyics, i tend to cut off the emotional side of myself. basically i'm using the left brain coz left side processes logical data.

so to do well in exams this have to continue for a few weeks and i'm beginning to lose the other side of me (i.e. the right brain) and become like a robot or walking calculator that makes practical and logical decisions instead of risk-taking and impulsive choices.

an example: to eat ice cream or not.
right side says: no. fattening. distracting.
left sides says: oh man i'm missing ice cream for weeks now. ben and jerry's. one scoop wun do harm. and i need desserts after meals.

it's like i watch gossip girls w/o the reactions i had when i watch the previous season or watch GIJOE w/o the excitment. and it's scares me! i'm like staring blankly at the screen, a robot watching something.

ya so i'm trying to get the left side to work more when i'm in bed so that i wun lose that side of me, while i'm using the right side to work during the day.

i really think emotions are really important and that makes us human. Recollection of the kinda emotions i have at that certain period of time is relavant, and i need to get that back after exams quickly so i can enjoy!

so till then, forgive me if i'm too analytical, practical and emotionless. it's the right side of the brain. haha